Division

Pour lire ce blog en français, veuillez CLIQUER ICI.

In childhood I was trained to mentally manipulate men from a distance, to enter into their head, use their blind spot to create urgency, and implement thoughts that were not their own, to create beliefs and direct their actions that would serve the network’s interests.

This training took place over a month’s time in the basement of a villa in Heidelberg, Germany. I was nine years old and was receiving mind control training to shape me into an elite sex slave who would be a perfect tool for the network. The first week of this torture-based training had consisted of learning to detect a man’s sexual deviance based on his face, the following had been consecrated to spotting a man’s weakness, also just based on his face. After these weeks of torturous exercises, I was shown a photo of an old man and told to mentally hold onto his image. I got a flash of information when I first laid eyes on the photograph; I could tell he was a pedophile who liked girls my age. He had a very deep soft spot, but I couldn’t instantly see what it was. Then I had to get inside a large, dark, coffin-shaped tank to float in body-temperature salt water, deep enough that if I panicked or would fall asleep, I would drown.

Once inside the tank, forced to relax and told to focus on the image of the man I had seen in the picture, more information started to filter through. The previous weeks’ training had sharpened my observational and intuitive knowing. This man from the photograph was past his prime, but only just. He was very afraid of becoming irrelevant. He really wanted to belong to the innermost club of world power, but during his years of glory, not all that far behind him, he had not been ruthless enough to secure a solid position inside the network. He was not getting invites like he did before.

I was ordered to focus deeper and tune into that fear of his. I had to insert my own consciousness into his, as though I were right with him, no, even closer, really inside his body and mind. I didn’t think it was possible, but this was the program’s theta training to stop thinking and open and use psychic gifts, and I guess the physical act of floating weightlessly for prolonged periods turns us into some kind of ghost and makes many strange things possible. Sometimes, I received a brief whiff of, say, coffee, or for a half second heard noises as if from a crowded street, or bits of conversation. I knew these were not coming from outside the tank; they were in my mind, and as I was told to say everything out loud that was coming into my head, I would instantly report on whatever I received. Sometimes I was told that I had been correct. Back then, the implications of these confirmations never occurred to me, but it appears that the man was being spied on in order to verify my psychic ability. Many flashes of this sort created an atmosphere of his life. I felt his loneliness. Sometimes I experienced a dull pain in my heart, and though I felt it, I knew that it was his pain, not my own. I sensed that he was quite preoccupied with his fear of not belonging to the inner circle anymore.

I was told by the handlers outside the salt water tank that the man in the photograph had been made aware that there was a buzz in the top echelons of the network about me, that he knew that I was set to become a star. The man’s thoughts and his budding sexual desire for me were all received and felt inside my own body. I experienced his sexual activity as his thoughts were with me, as if he were doing it to me, only softer, because it wasn’t actually happening. I was told to let my entire being express the high of the union between a very lonely man with this child, this elite sex slave who was exquisitely connected to him, as I mentally put myself in his embrace. I could smell him.

Next I was ordered to direct thoughts to him from inside his head, as if he were thinking them himself. I was told to tune in with his fear of missing out, and start thinking for him, about me, manipulating his thoughts and creating urgency, that if he doesn’t hurry and spend time with me right now, he never would, because in a short while I would be too popular and he would not be able to get me anymore. My thoughts needed to feature him in the first person and myself in the third, as if I were thinking his thoughts for him. “If I will be the first to buy her, then, when she will be the darling of the entire world, she will be my ticket back to the inner circle.”

This, I had to do for what seemed like days inside the tank. Remain attuned to him, follow his thoughts, direct them. When I started to fall asleep, I got salt water in my mouth and choked. Then I would be awake again, forced to relax and enter into a zone beyond fatigue or the restraints of the physical body where the veil between the tangible and the subtle sphere is lifted. His fear that he was over the hill was the hook, I had cast my line with urgency as bait, and he was biting.

After my month-long training during August in 1972 in the basement of that villa in Germany, the psychic abilities that were opened inside the salt-water tank were just as present; all I had to do was to still my body, preferably lie down on my back, and I could sense men’s thoughts about me. I was sent back home to my family in Belgium and started the fourth grade in September. During that and the next year, I was driven to Germany by Belgian handlers several times, physically brought to the old man whose picture I had been shown, whom I had mentally influenced from a distance, who was unconsciously serving as the guinea-pig for my training as an elite sex slave and spy. I reported back to the man who had ordered my mind control training, my owner, about what I had learned about the man in the photograph from spending weekends with the target, which was that he believed himself to be good. Interesting, considering he was a pedophile. And yet there was a grain of truth to his assumption. In the past, he had been a Nazi, and had gotten disgusted when confronted with the reality of the cruelty and violence of that ideology. Then he was in the network, without apparently realizing that the network were Nazis, only secretly instead of openly. You could be a member without knowing that secret, only, if you were clueless like him, you would never get to climb the inner ranks, and this pedophile never understood that the reason he didn’t make it to the top on the inside was because he was not enough of a Nazi.

Again, this network is an amalgamation of psychopaths and their minions who seek, in their infantile need, to gain maximum control over everything, including inside their own ranks and of course externally. They are incredibly skilled at attacking a person or a group by means that most of us would never guess at, infiltrating, gathering private information, create division and ultimately destruction from within, so that a person may suddenly find themselves sacked, or attacked by their closest ones, or a group breaks apart through inner strife, with the network as the secret guiding hand that is never even suspected. Who would ever dream that their thoughts might not even be their own?

Since speaking up publicly for the past eleven years, I have had contact with some people that are capable of genuinely making a difference on a large scale, not other survivors that are sharing their experiences, but outside professionals exposing the secrets of the network in full integrity, following the methodology of their expertise most carefully, rendering their findings indisputable and essentially fit for the mainstream public. They are journalists investigating cases, psychologists pointing to nefarious policies put in place by network-led instances affecting children’s safety, or philosophers with well-founded and properly attributed, academically sound arguments showing the inevitable direction in which the network is planning to take our society.

The investigative journalists that dare to tackle this issue may be censured at the last minute, before their program or article costing months of incredibly hard and delicate labor (for example getting and verifying physical evidence from organized abuse victims) is nixed by the head-editor of the mainstream television channel or publication. At least in one instance, I know of an article being pulled less than a day before was slated to be published in a mainstream magazine, after the other side (the perpetrators and official instances that had implicated themselves in these cases) had been contacted for their response, who were by then amply aware of all the evidence in existence to prove their guilt.

In recent years I have seen extraordinary things happen to serious journalists who went to incredible lengths to expose these dark truths, who came under attack by those close to them, who have lost not only their careers but everything they hold dear. Meanwhile the cases they brought to light were either sabotaged before publication, or, they did bring public awareness to the issue, and it took time, perhaps even several years, before the tide was turned back and the entire credibility of organized satanic child abuse was once again placed in doubt.

The network can observe any person posing a threat to its secrecy, and either infiltrate or create chaos in their lives from the inside out, using their mind control slaves, some of them perhaps even children. As I had learned to do to powerful men in my childhood, the network can inject thoughts into people’s heads, using people’s unfulfilled desires, fears and weaknesses to create an inner false narrative, attach urgency to it, and thus energetically push unsuspecting people to actions they might otherwise never take.

I am finding myself in the middle of one such situation, which a blind spot of my own kept me from noticing. Some time ago, my network persona who was slated to become a French celebrity was evoked. I have already done inner work with this persona and much of it has been integrated and healed, but I had not yet had the experience in which one of her functions was fulfilled.

First I was asked to be interviewed for a French documentary series. A French film crew of four met me in Belgium and we shot for one day. A year later I learned that the footage would be used instead for a full-length documentary film featuring several ritual abuse survivor testimonies, of which mine would be one, and I was flown to France for additional shooting days. Even before the film was released, I started receiving requests for interviews in France, the country that my persona was to call home. I was new on the scene and blind to the landscape. Without realizing what was happening, my persona was shining in interviews in which the interviewer’s excitement was not the sexual objectification which my persona was trained for, but the objectification of sensationalism in which I am being used to authenticate other people’s opinions. My French persona plugged in with amazing ease, blind to what I had been scrupulously avoiding in the English-language terrain, being used as a pawn for an ideology in which the issue of ritual abuse is lumped together with other causes and politicized.

For example, one interview I did was with a kind man who got emotional during our conversation, but when it aired it was preceded, to my horror, by an an adamant tribute to Trump. In another interview, the podcaster started with a clip of two French “truthers” discussing the issue of satanic ritual, neither having any expertise in the matter, whose pseudo-intellectualism was meant to validate my testimony. Though I publicly and privately share psychological insights that I gained like precious prizes through the hardships of the healing path, I have found them regurgitated word for word without mention of me, while I am referred to or quoted by these Frenchmen solely as a victim.

In a sphere were everyone can claim to be an expert if only enough followers are convinced and were personal opinions are easily accepted as facts, the network should have no trouble to discredit survivors and eventually sow doubt in those who saw the film and believed the first person testimonies. That sphere is rife with infiltrators and big, wounded egos that are easily manipulable tools in service of the network’s plans to destroy our credibility.

When I realized that it was my French persona that is comfortable around exploitative characters who had landed me in situations that I would not normally choose, I let go of her. This was followed by an invasion of extremely depressing thoughts, that stifled my will to live. Nothing had any meaning. My insignificance made my entire life - past, present and future - seem overwhelmingly paltry and useless. The emptiness seemed an endless, unbridgeable chasm. These fears hidden underneath my celebrity persona required time to be felt and then observed - they are formulaic; hidden underneath all attachment to glamour and fame.

I sat to meditate and with this new awareness, renewed my commitment to truth, first my own and in reflection truth in general, to get my ego out of the way and be as effective as possible for the task it appears I am being asked to perform - not for my own sake.

I trust that the truth will be known no matter the insidious, incredible, subtle and far-reaching tactics and resources of the network, the secret mafia of our modern times using gossip and rumor as first weapons to begin to destroy targets. Once the network will bring out their big guns, there will be twenty more films with hundreds more survivors speaking out. Too many people will trust their own intuitive knowing when they hear the truth, mine or someone else’s. Strife will go on indefinitely, but this truth of satanic ritual abuse of children, which is essential to get the big picture of why the world is what it is and why we can’t seem to solve the big problems of the day, cannot remain hidden forever.